


The Umbrella Academy One-shots

by sn00dle_noodle



Category: The Umbrella Academy (Comics), The Umbrella Academy (TV)
Genre: A Boy Needs His Dog, Angst, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Family Feels, Fluff, Fluff and Angst, Hurt Number Five | The Boy, Hurt/Comfort, Number Five | The Boy Gets A Hug, Number Five | The Boy Has Issues, Number Five | The Boy Needs A Hug, Number Five | The Boy Whump, Number Five | The Boy has PTSD, Number Five | The Boy-centric, The Umbrella Academy (TV) Spoilers, Touch-Starved Number Five | The Boy, oneshots
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-09-13
Updated: 2020-10-04
Packaged: 2021-03-06 14:42:28
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 5
Words: 7,511
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26440612
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/sn00dle_noodle/pseuds/sn00dle_noodle
Summary: Just a bunch of Five-centric Umbrella Academy one-shots. I assure you that everyone else will be in it too though.In this, Five is a legitimate thirteen year-old. He has still been through the apocalypse and everything else, he still knows how to snap someone's neck in one swift movement, he's just younger.Triggers will be at the top of the page so make sure to read the info there.I don't have a updating scheme.I love feedback and I'm up for constructive criticism!You can leave requests in the comments if you want to suggest something (no smut or reader inserts though).
Relationships: Dolores/Number Five | The Boy (Umbrella Academy), Number Five | The Boy & Allison Hargreeves, Number Five | The Boy & Ben Hargreeves, Number Five | The Boy & Diego Hargreeves, Number Five | The Boy & Grace Hargreeves, Number Five | The Boy & Klaus Hargreeves, Number Five | The Boy & Luther Hargreeves, Number Five | The Boy & Mr. Pennycrumb, Number Five | The Boy & Vanya Hargreeves, Number Five | The Boy (Umbrella Academy) & Everyone
Comments: 35
Kudos: 212





	1. Talking to the Walls

**Author's Note:**

> Five always talks to things that seemingly aren't there, but what if they actually are?  
> When Dolores 'speaks' put her text in italics and like this: '...'  
> Also, sorry if I make Five sound like an actual 13 y/o lol.  
> This is before he puts Dolores back btw.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Five has been seemingly talking to nothing and Klaus is starting to get worried.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I don't think there are any major TW's.

* * *

Five is an introvert to sat the least, he will lock himself in his room for days on end, only venturing out for coffee. But then again, on other days he would sit at the table and call his family idiots and make some sort of conversation that no one understands, so nobody ever really questioned it. That's when people started noticing his constant muttering. Was he really that pissed off at his family that he decided talking to himself was better? He seemed to pause and wait for something to reply like he was having a full conversation, nothing ever replied though because he was talking to the walls.

"Have you guys noticed Five?" Klaus asked out of nowhere.

"Yes we've noticed Five, he's literally here everyday, dumbass." Diego said with a 'duh' tone.

"Not like that! I mean have you noticed him talking to himself? Ben thinks there's something wrong with the small child." Klaus thanked the lord that Five wasn't down stairs with them. He wasn't hoping for any sort of injury today, or any day really.

"I guess so, but it's a common thing for people to say their thoughts out loud." Addison said.

"But he pauses, he waits for something." Klaus said waving one of his hands around, "It's like he's having a full conversation, does he hate us that much?"

"Probably." The siblings said in sync.

"If you're that worried, you should go talk to him." Diego said with a smile.

"He'll kill me! If I come out with a broken bone i'll be _lucky_."

"Well, let's hope you'll be lucky." Luther added.

**\-------**

"What do I do?" Klaus asked to Ben with urgency in his voice.

"Just go talk to him already, you've been outside his room for eight minutes!" 

"Ughhhhh, you're really no hel-"

"Wait, shhhhh."

"Don't shush me, Mister!"

"No, listen." Ben said gesturing to the door.

***

"Should I go down there?" Five started, he waited for a 'reply' that no one else could hear and carried on, "I mean I _have_ been living off of coffee for three days."

 _'I think you should, darling. You haven't eaten anything for a while.You've been in darkness as well! How about going_ outside _?"_ The manikin replied sweetly. Dolores was the only person who could call him nicknames without any sort of reaction.

He flopped on his back on the bed, "Outside... I thought you knew me better than that, Dolores. I know i've been in darkness too, obviously i'd remember that, i'm literally in it now."

_'You should drink something else except from coffee, Five. It's not a healthy thing to do.'_

"I know that! I need some vodka." He said with a sigh.

_'Not vodka, water. You should have some water.'_

"Water? Yeah, that would be good but I would rather not."

_'Why not?'_

"I know it's not healthy, I know, but I don't want it."

_'Orange juice! I know you love that.'_

"You've got me there, what would I do without you Dolores?" Five said with a smile on his face. He turned on the lights, making him wince slightly. He turned over on his bed looking at his ever-so-annoying alarm clock on his nightstand. It read 11:56 am. "Guess I could be down there for lunch."

***

"Who the hell is Dolores?" Klaus whisper shouted.

"No idea.. that's what you should talk to him about. I'm sure he'd prefer talking to just you then the whole bunch."

"Maybe... yeah let's do this."

***

Five jumped when he heard knocking on his door, "What?" He shouted.

"It's me Klaus."

"Okay?"

"I just wanted to talk to you."

"About? C'mon let's speed this up." The smaller of the three rolled his eyes, staring at the door.

"I'm coming!" Klaus exclaimed opening the door. 

"Aren't you always?" The assassin said with a smirk.

"No! No, i'm not!"

"Pretty sure you are." Ben said with a matching smirk.

"You shut up!" Klaus said, jumping on the bed, making the whole thing shake.

"See, Ben agrees with me." Five said, gesturing to where he thought Ben would be.

"He doesn't, because he loves his favorite brother."

"Highly doubtful. What do you want anyway?"

"A chat with my amazing, loving, beautiful, bab-" He quickly corrected himself when Five glared daggers at him, "Brother! I was gonna say brother!"

"Like fuck you where." 

"Well, can I ask you something?"

"Go ahead." The boy said with some sort of uncertainty hidden in it.

"Who's Dolores?"

"I-um, she's someone I met in the apocalypse."

Klaus' face softened knowing this was a tough subject for his brother, "I thought everyone was... y'know."

"They were." He was _not_ making it any easier for Klaus, but it's Five. He would never go the easy route.

The man's eyebrows furrowed in confusion, "Weren't you just talking to them a minute ago though?"

"Yes, yes I was." Ben and Klaus looked at each other with confusion in their eyes. Five sighed, "Dolores has been with me for a long time and if you judge her, I will actually slice your throat."

Klaus gulped and put his hands up, "No judging here!"

Five walked to the side grabbing something and bringing it to the bed, "This is... Dolores." His cheeks were lightly dusted red from embarrassment.

Klaus paused for a moment, Dolores was a manikin? He doesn't know what he thought she was going to be, but he wasn't expecting this. "Why hello, Dolores." He said shaking the dolls hand, "Nice to know my brother has a friend!" Five scoffed and put Dolores to the side again. 

"Dolores was my only company," Klaus couldn't help but feel a pang of sadness in his heart, "And even though she wasn't real at first, she became real. She's real to me. I treat her like a normal person because she is, well at least to me she is." 

"There's nothing wrong with that. But just know that if you need to talk to anyone, you can talk to me and Ben, or the rest of the family."

"It's just sometimes easier talking with someone, or something who you know will always listen and even if they don't want to, they have nothing better to do anyway."

"Damn, i'm gonna quote that." Klaus said with a smile, putting a hand on his brothers shoulder. Five flinched lightly, it was barely noticeable, but it was there. Soon enough, he let himself be touched by Number Four. 

Everyone knew Five was wary to touch. Because of years without any physical touch, it had taken a toll on him.

"...Thanks- uh, for not judging me or anything."

"No problemo, kiddo!" Klaus said rushing out the door with a smile.

"That thank you is taken back!" Five shouted running after him.

"You can't do that!"

"I fucking can and I will!"

* * *

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you for the support!  
> Thanks for reading; hope you enjoyed!


	2. Puppy Love

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Five finds a puppy and Diego makes a deal with him.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Tw: neglect for the pupperino and blood, nothing bad though.  
> One of my headcanons is that Five still talks to Dolores but in his head since he put her back.  
> 

* * *

Five had taken up walking around at night when he couldn't sleep, which was most nights if he was being honest. After Klaus had suggested it, he decided to give it a go and he actually found it pretty calming. He always made sure that he had his-

 _'Diego's'_ Dolores corrected.

 _Diego's_ knife that he keeps under his pillow with him though, just incase. 

Who knows what kind of people would be out at this time of night?

The thing was, he was drunk. Not 'I'm gonna double over and vomit', sick like normal. _Tipsy_ , that's the word.

He had been walking aimlessly for a while now, but when he finally knew where he was, he decided the park would be a good idea for once. He normally hated the park because people would think of him as just a normal thirteen year old. There has been a few times when Five had to tell a group of kids to fuck off and that he didn't want to play with them. His siblings thought that was particularly funny.

A breeze passed him, making the boy shiver lightly. It wasn't even that cold, maybe the alcohol was taking a toll on him. For once in his state, his legs didn't buckle as he walked through the dark alleyways to get to his destination. The boy watched the world move around him, nothing was happening really. Birds weren't singing, the moon wasn't glowing. Five sighed as he found the swingset, sitting on it, moving back at forwards in a steady way. It had always been his favorite thing to do at a park when he was a kid, just something about feeling so weightless and free. 

After a while of doing a whole lot of nothing, the sky had started to grumble, on the brink of a storm.

_What a great time to go outside?_

Suddenly as Five was about to go, the boy's thoughts were cut off by whimpering. _It's not like a kid would be out here now right?_

_'That doesn't sound exactly human, darling.'_

_No, it doesn't._

Five dropped off of the swing, walking on the damp grass across to where he thought the noises where coming from. Again, it was in another dirty alleyway.

"Hello?" He called out. _No reply_. "Obviously you fuckhead." He growled at himself.

The boy was on the edge of giving up and going home until he heard movement from the side of him. In a flash, he had grabbed Diego's knife and held it in front of him. 

Out of the dark a figure showed, a rat maybe? No, not a rat... _what's the name_?

 _'A puppy'_ Dolores said with a chuckle.

A puppy!

Five walked forward putting a hand out to see if he could feel anything, he flinched back when he felt something wet on his hand. As he looked closer, fur was on it now. 

_Definitely a puppy._

A whimper sounded and the kid dropped down onto his hands and knees, something he wouldn't normally do, but in this moment he had to, it was a puppy for god's sake! Now that he thought of it, he can't remember the last time he'd seen a puppy, _assuming_ that he has seen a puppy previously. If he hadn't seen one, it's just the common sense kicking in.

"Hello?" He called out again, holding the 'o'. This time he actually got some sort of reply, a small bark. "Come here." He made a gesture towards himself.

Slowly but surely, the little dogwalked out of the dark corner, bounding over to Five. He put his hand out for a second time to stroke the thin dog, instead he got bitten by the thing making him bleed. "Hey, that isn't nice! I mean, I can't talk but it isn't nice to bite people, got it?" The dog sat down by his foot, leaning against it. Five felt a smile creep onto his face, he quickly shook it away though. Five does _not_ smile. He stroked the dog without getting bitten this time. He watched at the puppy's golden fur mixed with the blood making an off-pink colour.

_I'll have to clean him later._

"What am I gonna do with you, little dog?" He asked the puppy before picking it up, the dog chewed at his hand again. "You need to stop doing that, you'll get too much blood on you. Wait, you could have rabies... that would _not_ be good. But you don't seem to be foaming at the mouth or anything, so let's just hope that I don't get a disease." 

The pup barked, making Five roll his eyes. Blue crackled at Five's fingertips seemingly not fazing the dog who just stared up at him. "You need a name because calling you Little Dog will get old after a while... Mr. Pennycrumb will do, right? Weird, but my name's Five so I don't think it matters." The pup barked loudly, it's tail wagging quickly, "I guess you appreciate the name then."

_This'll work out._

**\------**

The two ended up jumping to the middle of the large table, making plates that were previously laid nicely in their place, fall onto the floor making a loud smash.

_"Shit."_

Five quickly jumped again, hoping for a better destination, _fucking alcohol_. Gladly, the boy smiled as they ended up in his room this time. He sighed sitting down on his bed, putting Mr. Pennycrumb down. 

"You can sleep on the bed with me, I may be cold-hearted, but not _that_ cold-hearted. I mean, look at you, you're a puppy." The puppy laid down, curling into a ball. Five copied, laying down and turning on his side.

When Five was asleep, Mr. Pennycrumb came over to the sleeping figure and cuddled up against him. The pup yawned going to sleep for the night.

\------

Five woke up abruptly. He looked all around the room, making sure he wasn't stuck back in the dreaded apocalypse. The boy sighed in relief when he saw Mr. Pennycrumb placing a paw on his leg. He stroked the dog, trying to ground himself. It had actually worked, that was something he wasn't expecting from the pup.

"Guess it's time for coffee." Five said, sitting up and placing his new friend on the floor. That's when it occurred to him, he just stole a puppy that could've been someone else's, he hasn't ever had a puppy before and he needs supplies. He groaned, "Coffee can wait."

Five jumped downstairs, Mr. Pennycrumb running behind. _Money_... "Allison?" He said, slightly shocked. He quickly hid the puppy behind him.

"Oh, good morning, Five."

"Yeah, morning... can I borrow some money?" He asked awkwardly.

"I- sure, what for?"

"Just for some food."

"Food?"

"Yes food, I wanted to try something... different."

"Oh what food-?"

Suddenly, a bark sounded from behind Five.

"What was that?"

"It was nothing."

"Well it was obviously something. What was it?"

"Nothing! I said it's nothing, so it's nothing."

"That is _bullshit_ , Five."

"No? I don't think it is bulshit."

"Five. Tell me."

"It's my dog."

"Your dog? Since when have you had a dog?" Allison questioned.

"Since now, can I have some money or not?"

"Not if you don't let me see your dog!"

"I heard dog?" Klaus said randomly.

Five jumped but shrugged it off, "Where the hell did you come from?"

"Oh, I was just on the couch here. Am I really that unnoticeable?"

"Of course you are. Now, can I have some fucking money!?"

"Not unless I see your dog!"

"And me, I would love to see them!"

Five rolled his eyes and moved his leg to reveal an excited Mr. Pennycrumb jumping at his legs. The boy looked down at him with, affection? Or just his normal pissed of stare? It's hard to tell.

"There."

"Awww, what's their name?" Allison cooed, standing up to stroke the dog.

"Watch out, he bites."

"Oh, okay."

This was when Diego walked downstairs, "Twenty dollars if you can get the dog to bite Luther."

"Deal." Five replied bluntly.

"Ohhhh, this is gonna be fun!" Klaus exclaimed, laughing.

"He's called Mr. Pennycrumb, by the way," The kid said picking up the puppy, "Now, Allison?"

"Yeah, of course. There you go."

"Thank you, now we'll be on our merry way."

With that, the room illuminated a bright blue and Five with Mr. Pennycrumb in his arms, was gone.

\------

Five basically knew what he needed for the dog: food, bowls, collar and matching leads, it _had_ to be matching. He doesn't need a dog bed because he is openly allowed to sleep on the boy's bed, which made things a lot easier. That was pretty much it, ah, treats. He has to train Mr. Pennycrumb to bite Luther, now that will be interesting. 

"Excuse me, miss."

"Hello there, honey," Five inwardly cringed at the name, "What do you need?"

"I want to know where the collars are, also are the leashes matching?"

"Yep! The collars are over there and to the right, the leashes are also matching."

"Thanks." Five said walking off, "Hmm, what colour do you want?"

The puppy looked at all of the collars, yipping with excitement from just being held by their new owner.

"Red will work." Five grabbed the collar and lead and walked over to the machine that lets you imprint your dog's name onto the information-tag. 

Five stared at his creation around his dog's thin neck.

"Look at what I created, Dolores. An absolute masterpiece."

_"It looks amazing, Darling."_

The right corner of his mouth twitched upwards. After finishing looking at the collar, it was time for food. 

"So, what flavour?" He placed Mr. Pennycrumb on the floor, letting him go and sniff out the bags full of dog biscuits, "Chicken? Really? I thought you would've been more of a beef guy." 

The bowls were easy enough to get, he also got matching sets of them, one for water, one for food.

"All of this will come to fifteen dollars." _ **(Don't judge me, I don't know how pounds to dollars work)**_

Five placed the money on the marble counter, stroking his puppy lightly.

"Okay! Would you like a bag?"

"Uh, yeah, sure. Thanks."

Five walked out and waited for a moment, making sure he was touching Mr. Pennycrumb's lead, before teleporting back to the academy.

\------

**_A few days later..._ **

_'He must've been starving, the poor thing.' Dolores said sadly._

"Yeah, must be. Now that I think of it, I am too."

"Hello, dear brother of mine!"

Five sighed, "What do you want, Klaus?"

"That's not how you should talk to your big brother!"

"Leave me alone." Five said, trying to reach the peanut butter from the cupboard. Klaus grabbed it for him, putting it on the counter. The boy snatched it, applying a thick layer too the bread. After, he opened the drawer and put marshmallows over the bread too. Next, it was cutting the sandwich into perfect triangles. Done.

"How can you enjoy that?" Klaus questioned with a disgusted look on his face.

"How can _you_ enjoy bringing me to the urgent feeling to stab myself?"

Klaus snorted, "I know you don't mean that!"

"Of course you do." Five sat down on _his_ armchair, eating his sandwich.

Klaus sat on the sofa next to Luther, Diego and Vanya on the other one. Happily, Mr. Pennycrumb came bounding over to Five, jumping on his lap.

A smirk worked his way onto Five's face, "'Pennycrumb, look! It's the _ape-man_." The dogs ears perked up at the name and he looked to where the boy's finger pointed to.

"There's no way-" Diego said, a smile creeping on his face.

"Just wait and see. Go get him."

Like a bullet, the puppy ran over to Luther jumping and clamping his jaw around his arm. The man yelped, trying to get the dog to unlatch. Meanwhile, everyone else what dying of laughter.

"There's your twenty dollars! Thanks buddy."

"I mean, I would've done it for free. But you offered, so I accepted."

"You cheeky ass." Diego said with a smirk.

* * *

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Mr. Pennycrumb will now be in the other oneshots!  
> Sorry for this taking a while, I'm back to school and I've had no motivation in the slightest. Don't worry though! This will be carrying on!  
> I'm actually not American btw, I'm British. I'm just writing how the characters would say it.  
> Also, thank you so much for all of the support! 500+ hits in the past week-ish? WOW!  
> Thanks for reading; hope you enjoyed.


	3. Drowsiness

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Five hasn't been getting enough sleep and ends up drowsy, good thing his good ol' brother Klaus is there to help!

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This one is a bit whumpy, but it's fluffy too.  
> Okay, I keep on apologising for Five sounding too much like a 13 y/o, so why not just make him 13? He's still been through all of the shit, he's still an ex-assassin and he still saved the world, but he's just actually fitting his body lol. So Five is now a smart, sarcastic, traumatized 13 y/o. I'm also adding this to the description of the story too.

* * *

The boy's heart pounded in his chest as he opened his eyes widely, gasping for breath. Mr. Pennycrumb startled, waking up and sitting in Five's lap. He stroked the dog's fur, calming himself.

_Another nightmare, when are these just going to stop?_

He aggressively rubbed away the tears that welled up in his eyes. 

After he had calmed down, Five stood up and walked across his soft carpet to the door, letting the puppy walk in front of him. Today wasn't going to be his day, but when was it _ever_ his day?

Five yawned, stretching as he lied on the sofa, with Mr. Pennycrumb curled up by his chest. It had been a long night, he didn't even know the last time he got a _full_ night's sleep with the nightmares and everything else. Not to mention the terrible headaches he got because of it. But he 'coped' and that's all that mattered. But Five didn't know how much longer he could deal with it. The nightmares where so real that he believed he was back there, back in the dreaded apocalypse. The apocalypse where he only had a manikin as a friend. The apocalypse where he saw his family die.

He closed his eyes trying to get an _ounce_ of sleep in, already knowing this was going to be tiresome. He sniffed feeling a cold coming on, to be honest with himself he caught every bug people could catch, but he was too stubborn to ask for the medicine or comfort he needed. It was the same with emotions too, the 'hide it until you break' method.

"Hello, hello, hello brother-o!" Klaus exclaimed jumping on the sofa, not caring if he sat on the boy.

Five grumbled feeling his legs being squished, "Get the fuck off me." He hissed, getting no change.

"You're up early! What is it, like four o'clock?"

"You're up early too." The boy deadpanned.

"Yeah, but I woke up cause _you_ woke up."

"How about you don't next time?" He replied sarcastically.

Klaus faked shock, gasping and placing a hand on his chest, "I am offended!"

"Good." Klaus rolled his eyes with a small smile at the statement.

Suddenly, Five sneezed making his brother squeal and the puppy yelp. Five stroked between the dog's ears, "Now that I look at you properly, you don't look too hot." Klaus said, consern lacing his voice.

"Gee thanks." He said in a sarcastic tone, eyes closed again.

"Seriously though, are you okay?" Number Four asked, lifting Five's legs up so they where on his lap. He didn't even flinch or protest from the touch, there must be something wrong. It's even worse that he was in his pajamas, he would never wear them during the day unless he ran out of clothes or if something had happened the night before, like an injury, but only a serious one. And that's _Five's_ serious, not the average persons. It wasn't the case this time, because Klaus could visibly see the kid's clothes folded up in the kitchen. The boy still stayed there, humming with satisfaction when his legs were free of the weight. He wouldn't dare to say this, but Five did look quite adorable, the pajamas made him look even younger. Klaus decided that he would stay with his brother until he knew that he was alright.

"You know, just the normal." Five said.

"And what's the normal?"

"...Not being able to sleep." _Why was he letting Klaus know this? He should_ not _be doing this_ , "I'm fine. Stop worrying."

"Nuh-uh, no way. When's the last time you got a full night's sleep?"

"Ah, that's the dreaded question because I don't know the answer."

Klaus frowned, "Well that's not good." He muttered mainly to himself.

The boy yawned, struggling to move into a more comfy position. Number Four gently touched Five's shoulder making him flinch, but Klaus carried on anyway, guiding his brother's head so it could lay on his own shoulder.

"What are you doing?" The kid asked him tensely.

"Just go with it."

Five glared at him, but begrudgingly let Klaus stroke his hair.

"What are you trying to achieve here?"

"You seemed a 'lil out of it. You're _infected_ too."

"So you decide to cuddle the 'infected' person, knowing very well you could get sick too? Great move." The boy asked making air quotations on infected.

"Yeah, anyway I don't think I can catch what you've got anyway. Not getting enough sleep makes you sick sometimes."

"Incorrect, it weakens the immune system. So I do have a normal cold, just a bit worse."

"Why don't you try and sleep here? Nothing's going to happen to you if that's what you're worried about, and if something does, then I can help."

Five pondered for a minute, on one hand he could get some rest, but on the other, he didn't want to risk seeing _them_ again.

"No, I'm fine."

"Can you tell me why you can't sleep? Maybe it would help." Klaus said softly still stroking his hair.

"You already know very well what happens." Five said with a small voice, stroking Mr. Pennycrumb affectionately. He'd hate to admit it, but getting his hair stroked like this was actually pretty soothing.

Klaus pondered for a few seconds, "Ah, okay. Got it."

"Yeah."

"I used to have flashbacks and nightmares too, still do, but I just try to remember that it isn't real."

"But it _was_ , Klaus. It was real."

"Can you hear the word you're saying? Was. It _was_ real, it isn't gonna happen again."

"But how can we be so sure? It happened, it can fucking happen again." Five began worrying, his breathing picking up and he stroked Mr. Pennycrumb some more.

"You stopped it, so it can't happen again." Klaus wasn't sure if that was entirely true, but he just hoped his brother would buy it. He didn't a reply for a while, "You okay?"

"I-I don't know." Five said monotony, his eyes glossing over.

Klaus felt his heart break into little pieces, his brother sounding so sad. He wrapped an arm around the boy, rubbing his back whilst still stroking his hair. 

Five let his walls down, tears falling down his pale cheeks as he melted into the touch, "I'm so fucking exhausted, Klaus."

"I know, Fivey. I know. Let it all out."

"I might go to sleep... you'll be here though, right?" Five asked, rubbing his eyes and looking up at his brother.

"Yep, Mr. Pennycrumb too!"

"Promise?" 

"Promise."

After another minute, Five closed his eyes, arms around Klaus's waist tightly so he knows his brother is still there. Klaus closed his eyes too, yawning as he felt tiredness fall over him.

Let's just say that was the most peaceful sleep Five has had in a long while.

* * *

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> OMFFFFFFFGGGGGGGGGG WHAT??? HOW??? BRO. 300+ hits in the last 10 hours-ish?? THANK YOU GUYS!!!  
> I'm excited if you can't tell lol.  
> Sorry that this one's short and pretty bad.  
> Thanks for reading; hope you enjoyed!


	4. Claire

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Claire stays in the mansion with Uncle Five.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This one is fluufy-wuffy.  
> Idk what that was.  
> EHHHHH, I'm SICK!!  
> So here's something where Five's sick, but not in detail. I'll make a proper sickfic in future.  
> Tw: Vomiting

* * *

"I assure you Allison, I'm fine, we'll be fine. Stop worrying." Five groaned for the third time this night.

Yesterday, Five woke up with a sick feeling in his stomach and a lot of coughing. He had teleported to the bathroom as quickly as he could, knowing that if he walked there was a chance that his legs would buckle. Vomit came out of his mouth quickly into the toilet bowl, making his throat burn a significant amount. Five has had a deep hatred for puking after the apocalypse, the amount of ash falling from the sky had clogged up his throat may times, making him having to get it out some way or another. So he ended up making himself sick, trying to get the gunk out of his system. He wasn't _scared_ of vomit, because Five is _never_ scared. He just has a problem with it, memories that he'd rather forget come back to him.

When Allison walked in after seeing the door open. Five was hunched over the toilet and shaking somewhat violently, she assumed it was just because of the force of his retching. Her motherly instincts kicked in instantly. She walked behind his wetting a towel and carefully rubbing his back, knowing his insecurity of touch. He mumbled something, but it was incoherent so Allison carried on, pulling his hair back too.

*******

_"I didn't need your help, I would've been perfectly fine without it." He hissed, snatching the towel from his sister who was trying to wipe his forehead,_

_"Just let me help, Five. Let me run you a bath or something."_

_The boy chuckled dryly, "If that would make you feel better for whatever reason, then be my guest." He gestured to the tub with his hand that wasn't dabbing at his brow._

_Allison sighed, if Five accepted help, things would be a whole lot easier sometimes._

*******

"Are you sure? You were quite ill yesterday."

"Allison, I'm fine!" He said raising his voice. He held in his cough.

"Okay, okay," Allison gave in, "Claire needs to be in bed by eight, half eight at latest."

"But Mum! I thought it was nine at weekends." The girl whined.

"Not tonight, I'm sure Five doesn't want to be dealing with your madness all night."

"It's fine, honestly." Five said, sending a small smile to Claire who smiled brightly back at him.

"Do you know how to cook? Because I can cook something before we leave."

Tonight, the family where going to a club, 'partying all night' according to Klaus. Five would've teleported inside to hide from the guards at the entrance and sneak in. For once he was actually looking forward to it, because it had been a while since he had gone to a proper club and not just 'partying' in the living room with drinks from their bar. So he was pretty bummed when it turned out that he couldn't go because of a stupid stomach bug. 

In some way, Five was glad he didn't have to be in an extremely crowded space. After being alone for years, with his only interaction with a manikin, he gets overwhelmed after being in a room for too long. People are just so loud and there's so many of them, it makes his skin crawl and his stomach churn after a while.

"I'm sure I can cook dino-nuggets." Five replied sarcastically making Klaus snicker in the background

"Okay, I trust you."

"Well that's good, isn't it?"

Allison rolled her eyes, "You guys ready to go?" A chorus of 'yes' came from behind the three. 

"Let's get going!" Klaus shouted before hugging Claire and leading everyone out.

Allison waited for the others to get out of the room, leaving only herself, Five and Claire left in the room. "Thank you for doing this, Five."

"No, it's fine." He said with a cough.

"No really, you didn't have to do this, yet you did. I should be able to thank you for that."

"I haven't said anything against you thanking me."

Allison sighed, "Bedtime, eigh-"

"Nine!" Claire butted in, she gasped, "Are you in the mood for a hug, Five?" She asked politely after.

He hesitated for a moment, he wasn't in the mood for a hug because he already felt shit, but it's Claire. Although, Allison wouldn't be happy after telling him that he should tell the truth if he isn't in the mood for being touched. "Not really, sorry." He replied with a smile, which is only preserved for her. "How about we... hold hands instead?" He asked. She quickly ran over to Five and held his hand. Five let her because she knew to ask him unlike some, _(Cough, cough- Klaus -cough)_ of his siblings. He had been getting better with physical touch, people knew his limits and not so surprise him with it. If they didn't ask they would either be pushed away or he would have to watch their every move so that he didn't startle.

"Eight!" Allison countered. 

"Fine." Claire grumped with a pout.

A honk sounded from outside the academy, making everyone jump.

"Jeez, guess that's my queue," Allison said with a smile, crouching down to give Claire a kiss on the cheek, "Goodnight you two, love you both." She said with a smirk.

"Oh, fuc-" He glanced down to the little girl, "Frick off."

"Night, Mummy!"

With that, the door was closed leaving the two to their own devices.

"You can stay up till nine, just no telling mummy."

"Thank you, Uncle Five! Lips sealed." She beamed at him, making a zip gesture to her mouth.

"What does dinner sound like?" Five asked Claire, looking down to her.

"Dino-nuggies!"

"That mouth unsealed pretty quickly."

**\------**

Maybe dino-nuggets where a little harder than Five presumed. He had cut his finger whilst cutting vegetables, which Claire had been very quick to put a Hello Kitty plaster on, giggling at the boy's dismay, and the nuggets were _far_ from undercooked.

"Here are your slightly-burnt nuggets and assortments of vegetables."

"Thank you." She said with a giggle at how Five had presented the food, making it look like the dinos were walking on grass. "Aren't you going to eat anything?" Claire asked.

"I'd rather not. I'm not very well." He said patting his stomach. Bad idea, he gags silently.

"Are you okay, Uncle Five?" Concern was laced in her voice.

"Yeah, I'm good." That was a lie.

"Hmmmm..." She eyed him up and down, scrunching her nose, "Okay then..."

Five jumped to the counter, sitting on top of it. He sat there wondering what to say.

"What books do you like to read?" Claire asked, interrupting his thoughts. He held himself from sighing with relief.

"I like Einstein's books, The Theory of Evolution, stuff about quantum physics, I could always lend you one." 

"What's... quantum physics?" 

He's such a dumbass, why would he think an eight-year-old would know anything about quantum physics? "To put it simply, it's the physics that explains how everything works."

"Oh, that's cool."

"What books do _you_ like to read?" He asked, happy with the response about physics.

"I love Disney books and fairytales," Claire started.

Five stared at her for a minute. Obviously a child of her age wouldn't want to know about Einstein or quantum physics or any of his other sciency books.

"I could always try another one though!" She said enthusiastically.

A spark of hope grew inside of Five, "Are- are you sure? Because I can get one now."

"Yeah!"

Five hid his smile and teleported to his room where he looked through his stacks of books. "What to choose?" He muttered to himself.

_'I suggest that you don't pick a book, darling. She's a child.'_

"Oh, shhhhhh." Five whispered, this had got him excited. "Ummm... Theory of Evolution, let's go for that one." He said with a smile.

Five jumped back to downstairs ending up with him being in a fit of rough coughs. 

"You're back!" She exclaimed, putting her empty plate in the sink and patting her Uncle on the back which he didn't notice at the time, "Are you okay, Fivey?"

He _despised_ that nickname.

"Just pea-" _Cough_ , "chy."

"You don't sound it," She said crossing her arms as Five downed a glass of water.

He wheezed, "Want to watch a movie?" He asked, changing the topic.

"Yeah," She gasps with excitement, "Frozen!"

Five hides that he was going to roll his eyes, "Alright, we haven't seen that for a while. Let's go set it up."

"Can we have something else to eat first?" Claire asked.

"Wha- you just ate less than ten minutes ago."

"Pleaseeeeee?" She asked making puppy-dog eyes, his weakness.

Five rolled his eyes, "Fine, how do you feel about peanut-butter and marshmallow sandwiches?"

"I feel... ew."

" _You're_ ew." Five shot back.

"No! _You're_ the ew-iest!"

"I can't be because _you're_ the biggest ew."

"Uncle Five is the biggest ew in the whole entire world, times _infinity_!"

"Can't beat that." He said with a shrug making Claire smile.

"Can I just have marshmallows?"

"Not too many though."

"Okaaaaay""

**\------**

"So, who's that one again?" Five asked pointing to the screen whilst stroking Mr. Pennycrumb who was between the two of them.

"That's Prince Hans, he's the baddie!" The girl replied, not looking from the screen.

"But I thought Anna was dating him?"

"She is!"

"She's evil too?"

"No, Five! She's good, Anna doesn't know he's bad."

"Pretty cliche if you ask me."

Claire has given this movie rapt attention even though she has watched it at least seven times and watched it with Five three of those times. He wondered how the film could keep her attentive, especially when she gasps at the same events she's seen before.

By the end of the movie, Five was nodding off after not sleeping last night and Claire looked like she was going to do the same.

"Alright, Claire. Bedtime."

"I don't wanna." She fought sleep overcoming her.

Five stood up and picked the girl up, quickly jumping to upstairs with her. Claire had fallen asleep in his arms by the time they were in her bedroom. He coughed as quietly as he could, not wanting to startle the child.

Five vividly remembered him and Allison going out to buy paints and small pieces of furniture, he was actually happy to help, but from the amount of time his sister was taking, he became irritable.

*******

_"What one do you like more?"_

_"Allison, I missed most of my childhood and I'm only living it now, I don't know what Claire would like because I am not her. We've been standing in this isle for ten minutes and you haven't picked anything."_

_"Right, I'm sorry Five. It's just hard sometimes."_

_"Pick the yellow one."_

*******

He placed Claire down in her bed, sitting down on the end of it.

"You're not in a hugging mood, are you?" She asked him softly.

"No... not really."

"Can you come over here?"

"Um, sure."

When Five was at the top of the bed, crouching down by her side. 

"A kiss?" She asked.

"I- what?"

"Can I give you a kiss?"

"Y-yeah.." He replied somewhat nervously. It had been years, decades since he's had a kiss.

Claire looked at him for a moment before holding his face with one hand and planting a small kiss on his cheek. 

In the moment, Five was glad that his siblings weren't in the room. He stopped functioning for a moment as his face turned red from embarrassment. He stood up, ruffling her hair.

"Goodnight, Claire."

"Night, I love you!"

"L-Likewise."

With that, he left the room, collapsing on his bed with a wheeze. After a while of contemplating everything he could think of, he closed his eyes, falling into a well deserved sleep. 

* * *

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I really like this one.  
> Thanks for reading; hope you enjoyed!


	5. Wisdom Teeth

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Five needs to get his wisdom teeth taken out and everyone is excited to see him drugged up.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Tw: Needles, blood and drugs (medical).  
> I like making Luther and Five clash, but not in a completely mean way? Like in a half angry, half just wanting to piss off the other one. Also, I can just imagine Five and Klaus getting into the most stupid arguments lol.  
> I think this one is just fluff.

It had been painful for a while now, the constant ache in his gums and the annoying random jolts of pain. Having to chew food on the other side of his mouth was unbearable at this point. 

He's an _assassin_ for god's sake! He can deal with toothache.

It turns out that he _can't_ handle toothache. 

It was a surprise when his sisters found him lying in a ball on the sofa, groaning incoherently. Mr. Pennycrumb was sat on the floor, whining with discomfort about his owner.

"Alright you better shut it-"

_"Don't be rude, Five! Dogs have feelings too."_

"You better _shush_ it, or you are staying in my room with no form of entertainment in the slightest. Not even the _windows_ open to make you _'oh-so-joyus'_."

Vanya decided to speak up, "Um, Five.. are you okay?" She asked softly.

The boy sat up abruptly, holding his cheek, "Hello, Vanya."

"Hello, Five? Are you okay?" She repeated.

His family wouldn't judge him right? Five sighed, "I've been better."

"Oh, why?"

"I've had this toothache for weeks."

"Why didn't you tell someone?"

"It didn't seem _major_ at the time." 

Allison rolled her eyes, "Where?" She asked in her motherly-tone, crouching in front of the kid.

"Around this area." He said, motioning to his cheek.

Suddenly, Allison yanked open Five's mouth receiving a pained groan from him. Vanya sat down next to him, putting a hand on his shoulder which for once, he didn't flinch from.

"Sorry, I need to have a look."

"Well you could've warned me!" Five shouted, coming out weirdly because of his mouth being open against his will.

After a short while, Addison spoke up, "I think you need your wisdom teeth taken out." 

"Wha-? Fucking stop that!" He shouted as Allison closed his mouth.

"We could ask Mum to do it." Vanya suggested.

"What, now?" Five asked, holding his cheek again.

"Yeah, she should be able to do it." Number Three agreed getting up off of the floor and going to find Grace.

**\------**

"What's wrong, honey?" Grace asked as Five sat down on the table.

"Allison thinks I need my wisdom teeth taken out, but I don't think it's necessary-"

"It _is_ necessary, I looked inside of his mouth and it looks infected."

Five rolled his eyes, opening is mouth when Grace asked him too.

"Oh no! That looks nasty, definitely wisdom teeth."

"Shit.” Five groaned.

"Ah, don’t worry! I’ll fix you up now.” The robot said sweetly.

"Thanks.” He replied begrudgingly.

"Okay, lay down for me please, hun.” 

Five proceeded to do everything Grace told him until it was time to get the injection. Every time he looked at a needle, memories from the tattoo came back:

_Screams could be heard all around him, the amazingly horrible pain in his wrist kept on coming, and the man who was holding him down seemed angry. He couldn’t help but whine and cry as the needle pumped thick ink into his skin, the more Five thought, the more he understood that this was going to stick with him. A permanent reminder of this hell hole._

Ever since that day, Five cringed at needles, but that wouldn’t get to him. He’s not a child! Well... technically he is, but that’s not the point!

"Now, Five. I will inject you with anaesthetic which will make you fall asleep, I will count down from ten, but by seven you should be knocked out. Then, you won’t be able to feel a thing!”

"Okay.” 

The boy turned his head as the needle got pushed into his arm, he winced slightly but it wasn’t as bad as he thought it was going to be. 

Five felt himself become weightless, all most as if he was flying.

"Ten, nine, eight, seve-" By that time, Five was already out.

**\------**

Getting his eyes open was a struggle. It felt like weights were bringing his eyelids down, he groaned as he woke up, alerting the other person in the room.

"Oh! Hello, Five. How do you feel?" That voice was unforgettable, it was Vanya's

"Mmmm, I feel... okay?" It was a lot harder to speak properly than expected.

"Okay?"

"I mean... I feel weird, but that'th- th?"

 _Since when have I got a lisp?_ Five wondered to himself, "That'th probably the ane- drugth taking a toll on me."

Vanya chuckled, "Mum said that you shouldn't speak too much so that you don't open the stitches. Oh, and you should start feeling back to normal in the late evening."

"Wait- what time ith it then?"

"Um, around three-thirty pm."

"Oh. I've been out for a while then!"

"Yeah, Five. Do you wanna maybe watch a movie or something?"

The boy thought for a minute, "Hm, why not? As long as it isn't _Saturday Night Fever_ again." He said with disgust.

"You loved it." Vanya said with a smile, standing up and stretching her legs.

Five suddenly gasped, "How'th Mr. Pennycrumb?"

"Don't worry, he's in good hands. Klaus is taking good care of him."

"I wouldn't conthider that ath in 'good handth'"

"Would you rather Luther babysat him?"

"No way! Mr. Pennycrumb wouldn't like that either." Five messed with the tissues in his mouth, moving it around trying to find a semi-comfortable place for them to go, "Altho, when can I take thethe out? They're tho fucking annoying."

"I think in an hour or so, if we go watch the movie then you can take them out after that."

The kid shrugged, "Alright."

**\------**

"Mr. Pennycrumb!" The boy called as he patted his legs, glancing over to Luther who was in _Five's_ claimed armchair, "I gueth i'll be sitting with you idiotth."

"Five with a lisp is so cute!" Klaus exclaimed.

"It really ithn't."

"It really _is_."

"Okayyyy, what movie?" Allison interrupted.

"Um, how about _Singing in the Rain_?" Vanya responded.

" _Another_ muthical?" Five said in disbelief.

"I'm with, Five. Another one?" Diego added, Five nodded his head in confirmation.

"Well I think that's very good choice, Vanya." Luther said with a slight smile.

"No one athked you." Five said under his breath, making Klaus chuckle next to him.

"What was that?" He asked.

"Oh, nothing. Just good ol' Fivey here telling me an _amazing_ joke, right Five?" Klaus slung an arm over Five's shoulders.

The boy totally would've done something to get away normally, but now that his reactions where a little too slow, he didn't make a move. _Totally because of that_.

"You've overdone it now."

"Nahhhh."

" _Yeth._ "

" _Nop_ -"

"Boys! Let's just watch the movie." Allison stated, trying to get the two to stop bickering.

**\------**

It was halfway through the movie when Five felt his eyes become heavy, he took the tissues out from his mouth not being at all phased by the large amounts of blood on them. The boy sighed in relief, _finally_ they were out. That still didn't mean that his sleepiness was gone though. 

_Should I just go up to my room?_ He pondered, _but can I be bothered? **(MOOD, sorry I'll leave now)** That's the main problem._

Five decided that he couldn't be bothered. He sat there for a few more minutes before he couldn't deal with the tiredness anymore. Slowly, he leaned his head against Vanya's shoulder. He felt the woman move a little closer and drape the blanket that had previously been laying across her lap over his shoulders. Five smiled slightly into her clothes, "T'nks." He said, muffled by the fabric of Vanya's hoodie.

Maybe the tooth ache was something he could deal with.

* * *

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I am very, very sorry for not writing last week. I have no excuses, so am just straight up sorry. Then I give you this shitty chapter lol. This isn't discontinued or anything, don't worry.  
> I'm stuck on ideas though, if you have any I would love to hear them!  
> Also, thank you so much for the support on this book! 2000+ hits? Jeez guys! <3  
> Five with a lisp is cuteeeee. I know how to speak with a lisp because I actually have one lol, luckily it only appears sometimes though. So normally it's on the letter s and sometimes c depending on how you pronounce it, for example 'super silly sausages' would be 'thuper thilly thauthageth'. It's annoying af haha.  
> Thanks for reading; hope you enjoyed!

**Author's Note:**

> So that was the first chapter...  
> They will get better, I promise.  
> Comments and kudos are always welcome!  
> Thanks for reading; hope you enjoyed!


End file.
